What the Heck Is Methylation (and Why It’s Running Your Life)
Methylation is like your body’s behind-the-scenes health editor, quietly deciding how well you detox, how balanced your hormones feel, how stable your mood is, and how much energy you wake up with every morning¹. You don’t see it working, but when it’s off? Oh girl, you feel it.
If your methylation is out of whack, you might be dealing with fatigue that won’t budge, stubborn weight that laughs in the face of salads, mood swings that hit harder than your 8th-grade breakup, and PMS that feels way too personal.
The wild part? Most women have never even heard of methylation. But it could be the reason why “doing everything right” still feels so wrong.
Translation: You’re not broken. You just need to work with your body, not against it².
Methylation Testing: Not Just a Fancy DNA Test
This isn’t your cousin’s ancestry kit that tells you you’re 12% Celtic and probably hate cilantro. Methylation testing is a functional wellness deep-dive that actually matters. And trust me, it’s not just data, it’s direction.
A methylation test looks at key gene variants like MTHFR, COMT, and others that directly affect how your body processes nutrients, manages stress, clears hormones, and creates energy³.
It’s personalized biohacking made simple.
Think: less “23andMe,” more “why kale makes you bloated and caffeine wrecks your sleep.”
Because once you understand your unique methylation blueprint, you stop guessing, and start healing.
What Your DNA Can Spill About You
This isn’t just a cute genetic fact sheet. It’s a behind-the-scenes expose on why your body feels the way it does.
Here’s what your methylation test can actually reveal:
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Whether your body detoxes estrogen like a boss, or lets it hang around wreaking hormonal havoc⁴
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If you’re absorbing the vitamins in your supplements, or just making really expensive pee⁵
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How your body handles stress, carbs, and cravings, and why certain wellness plans leave you feeling like a hangry raccoon in Spanx
Basically? It’s your personal wellness cheat sheet. And it might just change everything.
The ‘Fatso Gene’ Is Real (and It’s Not Your Fault)
Yes, it’s real. Yes, researchers actually nicknamed it the “Fatso Gene” (rude, but real).
The FTO gene has been linked to increased appetite, reduced satiety, and a tendency to store fat instead of burn it⁶. So, if you’ve ever felt like your friend loses weight eating pizza while you gain weight eating spinach? This might be why.
But here’s the mic drop: epigenetics proves that your DNA is a blueprint, not a life sentence⁷. You can actually influence how your genes express through food, lifestyle, and targeted support.
With the right info? You stop blaming your willpower and start using your biology to your advantage.
Why Women Especially Need This Data
Let’s be real, women are gaslit in healthcare all the time.
“You’re fine.” (You’re not.)
“Your labs are normal.” (Cool. So why do I feel like a zombie in yoga pants?)
Methylation plays a huge role in everything that makes you feel like you:
Hormone balance, stress resilience, fertility, aging, inflammation, detox, yep, all of it⁸.
And because our hormones shift throughout life (hello, periods, pregnancy, perimenopause, and menopause), knowing your genetic blueprint gives you the tools to respond instead of react.
You deserve more than one-size-fits-all protocols or expensive supplements you don’t need.
You deserve clarity. Not chaos.
DNA Made Simple™: Built for Women Who Want Answers
Let’s make one thing clear: science doesn’t have to be scary.
DNA Made Simple™ was created for women who are tired of feeling like a medical mystery.
Here’s how it works:
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One cheek swab. No blood, no needles, no awkward doctor visits
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Private and secure results, your identity is protected with a barcode
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8 color-coded, easy-to-read genetic reports that tell you exactly what you need to know
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On-demand videos and personalized action steps, with me, Dr. Michelle Sands, a naturopathic doctor who actually gets it and breaks it down like your wellness BFF with a PhD
Oh, and if you want someone to walk you through it? You’ll get the option for coaching support. Because you shouldn’t have to decode your health alone.
Ready to Crack the Code?
No more guessing.
No more “you’re fine” when you’re definitely not.
Just answers, action steps, and actual support that works with your body, not against it.
Click here to explore DNA Made Simple™ and finally understand what your body’s been trying to tell you.
FAQs: The Stuff Everyone’s Googling
1. What actually is methylation, and why should I care?
It’s your body’s behind-the-scenes MVP, controlling how you detox, burn fat, balance hormones, and even feel emotions. When methylation’s off, everything feels harder than it should: think brain fog, burnout, and hormonal drama⁹. You’re not crazy or lazy, you’re just out of sync with your genes. Let’s fix that.
2. Can methylation testing help me lose weight and feel less exhausted?
100%, yes. This test shows you exactly what your body needs to unlock energy, burn fat, and balance your hormones, without crash diets or willpower games. If you’ve been doing “all the right things” and still feel like garbage? This is your missing puzzle piece⁶.
3. How is this different from one of those basic DNA tests?
Most DNA tests tell you fun facts, like that you’re 14% Viking and probably hate cilantro. Cute, but not helpful. Methylation testing tells you why you’re bloated, exhausted, and craving carbs at midnight, and exactly what to do about it.
Sources:
1. NIH National Library of Medicine. “Epigenetics: Fundamentals.” What Is Epigenetics?, U.S. National Human Genome Research Institute. Updated May 2023. https://www.genome.gov/genetics-glossary/Epigenetics.
2. Duarte, Julio D. “Epigenetics Primer: Why the Clinician Should Care About Epigenetics.” Pharmacotherapy 33, no. 12 (December 2013): 1362–1368. https://doi.org/10.1002/phar.1325
3. Friso, Simonetta, and Sang-Woon Choi. “Gene‑Nutrient Interactions and DNA Methylation.” The Journal of Nutrition 132, no. 8 (2002): 2382S–2387S. https://doi.org/10.1093/jn/132.8.2382S
4. Lucock, Mark. “Folic Acid: Nutritional Biochemistry, Molecular Biology, and Role in Disease Processes.” Molecular Genetics and Metabolism 71, no. 1–2 (2000): 121–138. https://doi.org/10.1006/mgme.2000.3027 .
5. James, S. Jill, et al. “Metabolic Biomarkers of Increased Oxidative Stress and Impaired Methylation Capacity in Children with Autism.” The American Journal of Clinical Nutrition 80, no. 6 (2004): 1611–1617. https://doi.org/10.1093/ajcn/80.6.1611 .
6. Keller, Maria et al. “Genetics and Epigenetics in Obesity: What Do We Know so Far?.” Current obesity reports vol. 12,4 (2023): 482-501. doi:10.1007/s13679-023-00526-z.
7. Jirtle, R. L., & Skinner, M. K. (2007). Environmental epigenomics and disease susceptibility. Nature reviews. Genetics, 8(4), 253–262. https://doi.org/10.1038/nrg2045
8. Menezo, Y., Clement, P., Clement, A., & Elder, K. (2020). Methylation: An Ineluctable Biochemical and Physiological Process Essential to the Transmission of Life. International journal of molecular sciences, 21(23), 9311. https://doi.org/10.3390/ijms21239311
